One thing holding me back

Well, I am feeling a bit better today I guess. I am back on my meds and my bad mood was mostly PMS. Some days I think I am only good at eating, pissing, shitting, and sleeping. But I know better. I have three jobs now. 1 normal, 1 new business to start rollin', and 1 demo to try and get out there. I have a producer now. Cool huh? I wish I had more time to devote to singing at the studio though. My boss at the normal job apologized and understands my distress which is nice. I forgave him but still haven't got very much to pay bills with yet. That should change soon but it is tricky to get start up money for the business I'm starting with the two most brilliant men in my family.

You know it was mostly start up businesses that got us out of the Great Depression? Really, we are facing something very similar now and so many people are suffering for it but those that are fine are not willing to give loans to start up business that know exactly how to fix the problems we are all currently facing with foreclosures and banks going haywire. I tell you we have a really awesome system set up and all that is holding us back is the start up funds.

My poor mom is stuck in another state for Christmas and is not yet able to come back so we will all miss her. I would fly her here but there is no moola to do so. She sounds like she is going nuts there and there is no place for here to stay here either. We will miss her birthday too. It is right after Christmas.

I hope my dad gets whatever he needs while gone the next few weeks. I hope my siblings are happy this season. I guess I'm feeling a bit sappy right now. Oh, well.

Things would get 1000 times better for everyone if we could just get the loans we need for the company. Then we could make the money grow and give it back. Then get more loans, make the money grow, then give it back. Unless people just want us to keep making it grow until they want it back. It as all well thought out, researched, and ready to go. We just need money to make it work to begin with. Its been a few years in the making and many of the most successful business take this long to build such strong foundations. Dang it! This is the best time for a business like ours. If only we could get started. Everything else is ready to go. We only need start up money.

I feel:

Moody, Restless, Stressed, and Worried