I am not only going to be on my time of the month for my birthday tomorrow but my mom's friends will be invading the household and we all got to focus on Uncle J's retirement party. I am so bummed. I just hope I can still dance with all these cramps buggin me. We are also all far too broke to do anything fun for my birthday and the only fun thing that is free is totally out of the question with all this going on at once. a total bummer. Oh, well by now I should be used to bad birthdays. The last real good one I can remember was when I turned 9. Most other years I was sick, broke, in a foster home, or at the children's shelter. As an adult, sick and broke is enough to get me down on my birthday. I am hoping next year will be better. Next b-day I will be old enough to rent a car on my own. Woopteedoo.
Today, even though I am bummed about tomorrow, cramped, and use the bathroom every two hours or so, I am in a better mood than yesterday. I went to bed earlier and I think that may have helped. I believe I will go to bed early again tonight.
Not last night but the night before I kept waking up every hour then rolling over and going back to sleep. I had a different dream every time I did this. Most were normal (well normal for me I should say) but one was down right horrible. I was at a circus watching the show then started being apart of the different acts in the ring. I had a lot of friends and it felt like I had been apart of the team for a long time. We were like a family. I liked to hang out with the clowns and i got the sense that several years were passing by. One day after a show I got a pet newborn puppy. I was so cute. I was so happy to have a pet puppy I took it everywhere I went. I put it in my jeans pocket. Sometimes it turned into a beanie baby puppy. Then a bit of logic creeped into my dream and I asked myself what would happened to a real new born puppy if put into a jeans pocket than I sat down at a restaurant booth and wondered if the puppy was real or a beanie. So I get puppy out of my pocket and at first it was a blurry image of a beanie put then turned into a real one and It had a broken neck! It was still alive and twitching. I burst into tears and screamed. I blubbered out to my clown friends, "What do I do? Help me! What have I done? I didn't mean to!" They told me to hurry up and break its neck all the way so it wouldn't suffer to death. I tried but couldn't. I told them I wasn't strong enough to do it, please help me. Then I woke up in tears and reached out for hubby who wasn't there. I told myself I was being stupid, that I am an adult, and it was only a dream. I roll over again and went to sleep wondering what the next dream would be. Thankfully if I had anymore after that I don't remember.
Last night I had a dream that my little sis and I got a new job at this huge company in the middle of Nowheresville. We liked our jobs and had a nice boss. It was my job to drive cars around and park them in the right spots. It was her job to make sure I didn't get lost along the way or stranded anywhere. I got to drive anything from high end cars to really gigantic trucks. I had to park them mostly inside the warehouses where the lines were. Back them up, turn them around, and make sure they all fit properly like that game Tetris. There was a hill nearby and I got to fly down that thing. It was a lot of fun. I got to show off my driving and parking skills to a cute co-worker of ours. We both like him but he only looked at lil sis but only talk to me. He was interested in her and nervous about it. I naturally didn't like that but I accepted it. One day after flying a mustang down the hill, I moved on to the truck parking chores, and Sis wanted to try switching roles for a change. The boss said it was ok but don't hit anything or cause any trouble. She got into the semi and started backing it up to line it up against the polls without hitting them or the one in the back. I guess in my dream those were safety polls around the spots that weren't there when I was behind the wheel. Well she did park it but it took forever and it was still crooked. We all light heartedly about it. The cute coworker walked by and saw the parking job while she was climbing out of the driver's seat. He said he hadn't noticed it was such a tricky task and she should go back to the job she is good at. Her face turned red and I felt sorry for her. I stopped liking him after that but teased her about her "boyfriend" ooooo. We laughed again and continued our job. We really liked our job and that we got to work together. The sun was out. There was a great view of the desert and mountains. We chatted while we worked until it was time to go home. Home was a really big house with so many rooms it could have been a hotel. It was absolutely gorgeous everywhere in the house. We shared it with some if the other workers and enjoyed the company especially when it was time to eat at the table or out in the patio or deck or backyard. It was a nice happy dream. I am glad of that.
As everyone who knows me knows I have a lot to say and could type to you all day but I will spare you and just go play chess now. I hope all of your days and nights are well.
Miki
P.S. You all better get me presents. For ideas I made a list. You can ask hubby to see it.
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